Together and Forever in my Heart-What life tears, your heart holds...

 

Life is what it is...That is what life is...Such is life!

There is no "forever" in life as much we desire. There is a beginning and an end as we know very well. And what matters is how we live in that journey between a beginning and an end. The short time in between the two pillars of life has to be realized and lived to it's fullest and yet we easily forget that. Time is never enough and time is not everlasting though the memories are eternal when treasured in one's heart. 

In this life, not everyone is fortunate enough to experience a lifetime of love and happiness. Only some have the honour and fortune of sharing years of love and togetherness. This story that touched me today is that of a very beautiful and loving elderly couple whose love grew stronger and deeper with time over the years and how they wished to continue holding hands to pass over to the other world. They did not want to let go of each other even when life's end called on them but life as ruthless as it is chose to take one before the other.

I just watched "My Love-Don't cross that river" on KQED PBS. It was a heartfelt tribute to the precious love of a very aged couple who had a history of 76 years of togetherness in which they grew even closer with time and age despite challenges. They lived in the beautiful countryside of South Korea where they celebrated their love for each other every day through simple gestures and things. They did things for each other and cherished each other in each breath that they had left in them. They cared for each other and took care of each other without any help from anyone. But their intense love for each other made them strong and secure even at that age.  

Watching their moments together was so heartwarming and yet so heartbreaking because one knew that these moments would not last much longer. One wished that there would be no end to their special bond in this lifetime. This real-life story showed their moments together when they enjoyed just being together and celebrating their love as well as affection for each other daily. They enjoyed each and every moment and made the monotony of life and routine work so magical with the much expressed caring for each other. 

They played in the snow and they threw leaves at each other only to show that age had not dulled their enjoyment in being with each other. Their hearts appeared young even though trapped in the bodies of old age. They teased each other even while doing simple household chores which demonstrated their involvement in each other. They were there for each other in every way and helped each other by doing things for each other while holding each others' hands to guide each other.

 It was so wonderful to see that romance was not lost to them even at that age. They lived alone at such an old age with their two dogs and yet they seemed so contented, happy, and peaceful. They appeared to be lost in each other completely! They were living alone but living a life rich in love and every day was so meaningful because of the depth of their connection. They were so absorbed in each other that they actually did not need anybody else or require anything else even though their children and grandchildren visited them occasionally.

Such is true love! It goes to show that love has no boundaries of age...And yet the loving relationship is so painfully tragic when it has to face and endure the separation from the other. And the story speaks to us of their feelings as to how they don't want to part with each other even in death. But even then she prepares for his new journey to the other side as is the custom so that he has all his things with him till she can join him in the other world as she says. That really strikes the chords of our hearts and moves us to tears. I was profoundly sad when it came to the part where the husband is fading away from life and how she desperately clings to hope and prays he would live on for some more months. To see her weeping endlessly in bidding farewell to him in the snow before heading back home alone reminded me that how very lonely she must have felt and yet she had to continue living without him.   

 True love actually transcends age and life...True love lives on eternally in the heart of another's heart as the connection is very deep. True love is a commitment of a lifetime and beyond it. That is what makes it so beautiful but painful too...Such is the love story of a lifetime where one grows and blooms in one's love for each other only to wither in the end. What blooms has to wither as that is the norm of life. And yet it is so difficult to accept that... Your heart holds forever what life tears from you.  

          

   

Life was always fragile but more so now! In these very dark times, also lies more difficulties and heartbreaks. Families cannot be there for each other to support each other as travel restrictions have become more rigid than ever before. I am seeing so many suffer around me every day because of it. 

 However much positive you may try to remain, you cannot escape the pain you feel to see others in pain at this time. So many I know could not make it on time to be with their loved ones who lost their lives to this deadly pandemic and so many others are trying so hard to overcome all the obstacles of airlines' travel restrictions and visa or passport related problems to make it back home to India or elsewhere to be there for their old parents or any other loved one. The delay in their emergency travel is naturally affecting them so badly! 

Each moment weighs so heavily on them and they feel just lost, helpless, and stuck when they are not able to reach their families right away and they have to wait for appointments for emergency visas or for their passports that have gone for renewals to be returned to them. They have to wait for appointments as walk-ins are not allowed during this time. But time is the biggest factor here as life does not wait for anyone...What do people in such situations do? Do they just resign to fate and let life take its natural course of action? Do they just keep waiting for things to happen while each breath of their parents is difficultly taken and their eyes search for them?      

To add to it, it is difficult to get emergency visas for people without a letter from the patient's doctor and it is so difficult to reach doctors from overseas in these times particularly because they are not able to answer phone calls or emails in these trying times. One shouldn't have to go through this! I witness that every day here and my heart goes out to their families and them. We as a family had been through that too some months back when we had a medical emergency back home and each minute was so difficult especially because we had to first tackle the challenges of completing all pandemic-related travel formalities in the form of various documents and tests as well as get an emergency visa.  

A person I have not yet met but got acquainted with through our neighborhood group is having such a tough time making it to India right now even though she has able to gather most of the required medical documents for her emergency-related travel with the exception of a letter from a Doctor and her passport which is stuck in the renewal process right now. Her in-laws are in a critical condition and she needs to be there for them especially because as mentioned by her, unfortunately, her husband can't make it just yet because of unavoidable circumstances. To add to her problems she has to leave her kids here because it is not safe for them to travel. 

For so many days now she is trying to make it back to India but she is facing many challenges despite having medical reports of her in-laws indicating that they have COVID and severe infection. I am doing my best to be there for her and try my best to give her emotional support as well as some useful advice. But that is not enough as she needs to be on her way to India as soon as possible! This is what made me share my thoughts here today. 

 Right now we as Indians are there for each other here and have come together in providing all forms of support to people back in our country. But what is needed is something more! We have to assist those who need to travel back home due to emergency situations by helping them out in quickly coordinating their travel arrangements and preparing all the needed documents for their travels. At that time one is already so lost and having to deal with all this stuff makes matters worse.  I remember how I was running around for printouts of all the required documents for my travel at the last moment as the airports especially in the destination country required that. 

We need entire support from our Indian community leaders here to work with the Consulates in organizing more emergency helplines and help desks in every city here to assist people in emergency situations in every way possible. I am sure that the large population of Indians in the United States can easily manage to do that and gather volunteers too. It is true we all are doing our bit and helping out each other the best way we can but it requires more structure and definition! And for that different groups, institutions, and organizations will have to work more closely together to assist people traveling for emergency purposes. Let's make it easier for all as they already have so much on their minds at that time and have a long journey to embark on to reach their loved ones to help them get better...Some are crossing over that long-distance just to bid a last farewell... Each journey requires so much support when taken for reasons of a medical emergency in the family or a sad ending. And that is why we need to support them more at that time and make things easier for them...

                     

   

 

As sleep evaded me, I thought about all that is happening around us. I wonder for how long the world will be enveloped in this darkness of the pandemic. The stillness and the darkness of the night have not ended even though dawn will greet me soon while I write my thoughts...

We are waging a war against an unseen and unpredictable enemy which has not only taken away our lives from us but taken away precious lives forever and divided us in faith. Today the world is divided in belief and not so much in borders. The world is divided between believers and non-believers. There are those who believe that this too shall end and our lives will be given back to us. While there are others who believe that we can never escape from what we are going through. Some days there is hope that prayers will be answered and we will be free again but there are some days when there is only dismay that surrounds us...We may be in a conflict with our own selves too when we are witnessing immense suffering and tragic losses around us. Yet do not let faith desert us...

Today the world is separated in its outlook and responses. There are those to whom it does not matter anymore whether our lives will be restored or not to what it was or whether normalcy would be truly restored since they have already lost so much. And then there are those who are numb...There are some who are very empathetic and going out of their way to care about each other and support each other through this crisis. But there are others who want to continue remaining detached and oblivious to what is happening around them and continue their lives as before with total disregard to how their actions might harm others or disrespect others at this time. It is time that we align our thoughts...

Needless to say that the world is suffering the worst kind of pain and sadness ever. The world requires to be healed and the healing will take longer than expected. The only choice left to us right now is to face whatever may come and stay strong as much as we can...We have to rebuild and restore our lives in every way possible. But we are fighting a very unpredictable and faceless enemy. We have to stand together as one world to combat this deadly virus. And through these difficult times, we must stay committed to being kind and helpful to each other. Strength comes easily when people care about each other.  

As always History will always be a painful reminder to us that so many innocent lives were lost yet again due to the cruel ambition and ruthless intentions of certain individuals. So many had to pay the most terrible price for the most irresponsible and careless actions of some who brought this upon every one whom they even called their own as well as others. But the actions of some cannot be blamed on others. Let not the present times divide us through hate and mistrust but instead let us embrace each other all the more at this time to get through this ordeal together. 

We can just hope and pray that this too shall end like many such destructive happenings before it and we never face something like this ever again! But can there be such sureties in life especially when playing with lives is something that comes so easily to those who may not have a conscience? We cannot trust what time brings us going forward but we can place trust in ourselves in how we deal with it to the best of our abilities. We can also try to place faith in hope for better times to come. I want to believe that there will be light after darkness. In fact, I believe that things will change for the better. Times will change because nothing remains the same for long... that is the law of life! Such is life!